I've neglected this little blog of mine in a big, big way. Not because I've been busy (though I have) but because I'm a person that can't tell a story unless I can tell the whole story, and the thing is, right now, there's just "stuff" going on in my life that isn't blog fodder. Because it's B's story just as much as it is mine, and we have to work through it together. So know that. Know that there's this "stuff" on the sidelines that I'm struggling with. And part of the purpose of this blog is to preserve my own memories - the story of my little family. I envision looking back at this blog with my girls, them reading it long after I'm gone from this world, and them seeing a slice of who their mama was, what their life was like, and knowing just how very much I loved them and how much joy and magic they brought to my life. And, well, there's been this "stuff" going on that I'm not even sure I want to preserve. I'm not sure "posterity" is what I want for this "stuff."
But, I can't stay away from this blog anymore. I can't. It's too good for me. So, I'm going to keep writing, and telling you about my sweet girls, and the sweetness they bring to my life. I promise.
And tonight, on the first day of 2013, I'm totally without any eloquence or New Years resolutions . . . so instead, I say this:
May 2013 bring less uncertainty, less struggle, more joy, more happiness, and tons of magic.
May I feel more sure of "us" one year from now than I do right now. Because feeling not so sure really sucks. May my girls always know that even when things suck - even when things are hard - they light up my world in a big, big way. They make my world go round, those two.
Here's to 2013, friends. Thank you for staying tuned, even if I haven't blogged in over a month. I may have the "stuff" sitting on the sidelines, but I'm back. I'm blogging. I promise. Because I need to.